By Joni Edelman for Ravishly.
Oh my God. Do you guys have sex? Do fat people even have sex at all? Does your husband even WANT to have sex with you? Can he even get an erection?
This one time, a producer of a popular evening news television program called me to request an interview – body positivity, et cetera. The fellow, we’ll just call him Bill, was nice enough, not at all abrasive, and seemed genuine.
He didn’t chastise me for my supposed laziness, my poor eating habits or lack of discipline, my BMI of 31 (32?), my glaringly obvious double chin, the three packages of Spring Oreos in my cupboard. Bill said they were working on a feature story about fat women and relationships, and that the lovely Tess Holliday would be included in the feature as well – Me + Tess = MAGIC.
And then the real pitch started with him talking about my “skinny” husband, what’s it’s like to be a fat (and by association, unfortunate?) woman in a relationship with a thin man (apparently this is called a “mixed weight” relationship. RUDE.). The conversation ended with my saying I’ll be in touch — and then never being in touch.
He didn’t have to tell me what he was getting at. Shows that are founded on the premise of you have [insert personal “problem” here] and are, therefore, worthy of gawking at, are good for ratings. Especially when they involve love and/or vaginas. (How long is the average schlong? Post continues after video.)
A. Even though it is an anatomical truth that my husband is, in fact, smaller than me, it certainly doesn’t warrant an entire half-hour program devoted to its discussion. (Post continues after gallery.)
B. The fact that anyone thinks that the love/sex habits of a fat woman and her skinny counterpart are television worthy only reinforces the perception that the life of a fat person is so obscure, so completely outlandish, that the world would need a docu-drama to understand it.
C. No.
Hi World, there is nothing about me that is TV worthy, except I have five kids. That’s literally a sitcom.
(SPOILER ALERT: We are totally, painfully average.)
I’m not an exception. I’m not an anomaly. I don’t need a documentary detailing the normalcy that is my life. I don’t need to be told I should feel lucky to have a man that doesn’t care about my size. I don’t need to give television viewers a glimpse inside the house of the lady who “let herself go,” and the man who puts up with her.
We love these celeb quotes on body image.
Lena Dunham
At the 2012 New Yorker Festival, the magazine's TV critic, Emily Nussbaum, asked Lena Dunham, producer, creator and star of the hit HBO show "Girls," why Dunham is naked in so many scenes.
Rebel Wilson
The actress took to Twitter to say, "I'm not trying to be hot. I'm just trying to be a good actress and entertain people."
Adele
"The first thing to do is be happy with yourself and appreciate your body -- only then should you try to change things about yourself."
Christina Aguilera
"I am always in support of someone who is willing and comfortable in their own skin enough to embrace it," the singer said in a recent interview.
Alexa Chung
Chung responded to critics who suggested that her slight frame made her a bad role model for young women, saying: "Just because I exist in this shape doesn't mean that I'm, like, advocating it."
Stella Boonshoft
The NYU student started the amazing Body Love Blog, where she posted this picture of herself and wrote an open letter to those who feel entitled to shame others for the size or look of their bodies.
Ashley Judd
After the March 2012 frenzy around Judd's "puffy face," the actress fought back in The Daily Beast, calling the media out for making women's bodies "a source of speculation, ridicule, and invalidation, as if they belong to others."
Beth Ditto
This 5-foot-tall, 200-pound singer spoke openly about her weight to The Advocate, saying, "I feel sorry ... for people who've had skinny privilege and then have it taken away from them. I have had a lifetime to adjust to seeing how people treat women who aren't their idea of beautiful and therefore aren't their idea of useful, and I had to find ways to become useful to myself." Image via
Lady Gaga
After the media focused on her alleged weight gain in September 2012, Gaga hit back at critics by baring her body in photographs, sharing her struggles with an eating disorder, and inviting her fans to join her in a "body revolution."
DEBRIEF DAILY