We have bad news, so brace yourselves.
We’re about to enter a new era of confectionery.
Lolly-maker Allen’s has just announced it will stop selling some of its classic treats. In a statement to news.com.au, a spokesperson said the brand were “streamlining the portfolio”.
Damn you, Allens. Not the Marella Jubes!!
Sadly yes, Marella Jubes will go.
What else didn’t make the cut?
1. Sherbies.
Sherbies could never compare to its superior wrapped brothers, Fantales and Minties.
2. Spearmint leaves.
They certainly have a loyal following within the Debrief Daily office. Needless to say, there will be tears today.
3. Green frogs.
Okay, they were always the poor relation to the red frog. Poor, unimpressive green frogs. Poor Kermit.
“We were selling one Green Frog to every 10 Red Frogs,” the Allen’s spokesperson said.
Damn economic rationalism.
While these will be the only lollies to completely disappear, there are more cuts to come.
Butter menthols, Jellytots and Oddfellow Mints will also leave the aisles
Violet Crumble bars will still be sold, but gone are the days of packs of 12 that could be divvied among children’s lolly bags.
Killer Pythons will reduce in size, from 47 to 24 grams – yes, that’s like HALF THE SIZE – and Redskins will go down to a measly 11 grams, the Herald Sun reports.
In response to this shocking news, Debrief Daily has a proposal….
Give us back Marella Jubes, and we’ll give you milk bottles.
What’s your favourite Allens lolly?
DEBRIEF DAILY