When you’re in a relationship, you make the commitment to be faithful to one another — but what exactly does that mean?
Particularly with the introduction of online dating and social media, the lines of what can be considered ‘cheating‘ have been blurred – not to mention that they can vary drastically from couple to couple.
A recent Reddit thread asked people what counted as “cheating” to them, and the answers are varied.
1. Secret conversations
“If there’s a conversation you’d be unwilling for your significant other to hear/see, that’s a red flag,” suggested one user.
This could be a conversation on inappropriate topics, about your partner to another person or even planning an activity involving another person that you hide from your partner for the wrong reasons. Often this can fall under the category of an ‘emotional affair‘.
“When one engages in a physical affair, a person knows that they have overstepped their relationship boundaries and committed sexual acts outside of their relationship. With the constructs of emotional affairs being plagued by blurred lines and boundaries, in general it makes it easy for people to justify to themselves that they didn’t do anything wrong by their partner,” explains Faustino.
“In addition, the person may not even be fully aware that they have engaged in an emotional affair and simply brush it off to ‘just being good friends‘.”
2. Flirtatious texting
“Text flirting is the worst because of how private and sneaky it can be,” says the_kids_laugh.
“A workmate that’s getting married next weekend started texting me a few days ago. He asked where I was spending my weekend so he could come join me. I am still mildly shocked and don’t know how to react. He’s always kept a safe distance. I responded to the first few messages because I wasn’t sure that he was OK, then froze a soon as I found out he wasn’t going to stop texting. And now I’m wondering if I’m overreacting. Don’t know what happens when I see him at work tomorrow.”
3. Using cam girls
“Something my wife and I just discussed due to a friend’s marriage ending over this: Using cam girls. My wife and the friend who’s getting divorced view this as cheating since you are actually interacting with someone in a sexual nature,” said one user.
Cam girls involve usually paying for webcam time with an individual.
While some believed using cam girls are more likely to be considered cheating than actual porn due to the individual interaction, others argued it was the equivalent of stripping.
“As a camgirl, I find it hard to see it as cheating? I always thought of it more like a stripper, you know, look but can’t touch? So I guess if someone thought going to see strippers was cheating then yeah, cam girls would be too,” wrote user EmMeo. (Post continues after gallery.)
On-screen cheaters
Mad Men
We've lost count of the number of times Don Draper's been unfaithful - but his fellow Mad Men are no better.
Match Point
This Woody Allen movie portrays a particularly damaging affair between a man and his brother-in-law's wife (played by Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Scarlett Johansson)
Sex and the City
Carrie and Mr Big's affair broke up one relationship (Carrie and Aidan) and one marriage (Big and Natasha)
Friends
"We were on a break!" Did Ross really cheat on Rachel? We may never know. At least it all worked out in the end, huh.
The Graduate
Mrs Robinson, memorably, had an affair with a family friend many years her junior.
Closer
If you haven't seen this movie, allow us to summarise it for you: everyone cheats on everyone. And it's one big mess.
Gossip Girl
Nate broke his girlfriend Blair's heart when he had an affair with her best mate, Serena.
Glee
Puck and Quinn's affair resulted in a surprise pregnancy.
Sliding Doors
Admit it, you high-fived yourself when Gwyneth Paltrow's character finally flushes the awful Gerry from her life.
Love Actually
The scene where Emma Thompson's character discovers her husband (played by Alan Rickman) is having an affair is nothing short of heart wrenching.
DEBRIEF DAILY